today’s follow-up doctor session:
dr: you can resume normal people activities
me: like exercise? football?
dr: no, just walking
today becky, paul, and i participated in operation get becky back into the 930 club. she got kicked out for underage alcohol possession (i’m surprised they didn’t do anything besides confiscate alcohol and kick her out). but she got two black Xs on her hands and it was like the worst moment of her day. she had been looking forward to the show SO MUCH and it was going to be the show of her LIFE. and thus we walked around waiting for julia and plotted.
how to smuggle a girl into 930 club
given: two torn tickets, one untorn ticket, one person stamped, and one person Xed
1. go to cvs and buy hand sanitizer and candy
2. scrub your hands til they fall apart and are sticky
3. obtain napkins from random chinese food place
4. go back to cvs and buy permanent markers
5. draw “8:15” on hand of unmarked person, fudge it a bit so the marker bleeds
6. go to subway (food, not metro) to join friends that are eating, show off cool fake 8:15 stamp
7. scrub your hands even more
8. change clothes, hairstyles, bags between hand stamped and hand Xed girls.
9. go back to 930 club
10. send X girl in successfully.
11. send stamped + ticket girl in successfully
12. pretend to be on the phone while quickly rushing through with your fake 8:15 hand, successfully
13. enjoy jimmy eat world
14. be profusely thankful that Xed girl got in and that 8:15 boy was smart enough to dream up and pull off the plan